How do you do it?

Me- "It's easy, I just gain weight."

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Weight Jokes More Weight Jokes

What do you call a rabbit who lifts weights?

A jacked rabbit.

Why couldn't Cauchy lose any weight?

Because every time he saw a street pole he imagined two pies.

Gain Jokes More Gain Jokes

Why doesn't Hermione keep her money at Gringotts?

Offshore investment gains a better return.

What did the ruler gain a reputation for while campaigning?

Straight talk.