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How do you know someone is from California?

They tell you.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How does a blind parachutist know when to pull his rip-chord?

The leash goes slack...

How do historians know that Joseph wasn't Jesus' dad?

Because when you're a carpenter in the desert you can't get wood.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you tell the difference between a computer scientist and an aspiring music artist?

Ask them what 'unsigned' means.

Why do you want to be a librarian?

Me: "I like telling people to be quiet."

California Jokes More California Jokes

What two places can you find a California roll?

Sushi bars and stop signs.

Why ya going to the airport?

Flying Somewhere?": "How'd you guess?": "Well, I saw your luggage, then when I saw the airplane ticket I put two and two together. So where you headed?": "Aspen.": "Mmm, California.. Beautiful."