24+ Funny California Jokes

Why ya going to the airport?

Flying Somewhere?": "How'd you guess?": "Well, I saw your luggage, then when I saw the airplane ticket I put two and two together. So where you headed?": "Aspen.": "Mmm, California.. Beautiful."

What do you call a knuckle sandwich in California?

A fist taco.

Why did the blonde move to California?

To be a star on Broadway Creds to That 70's Show S04 E6

What two places can you find a California roll?

Sushi bars and stop signs.

Why does California have more lawyers and New Jersey have more toxic waste dumps?

New Jersey got to choose first

How many straight men in California does it take to change a lightbulb?

Both of them

Whose fault is it that California always has earthquakes?

San Andreas fault.

What kind of cigarettes do California kids smoke?

Yours.

Why is Reggae so popular in Utah right now?

Because it was popular in California 10 years ago.

What do you get when you mix gangsta rap and relational aesthetics?

Albums released through California penal records.

Why is it so expensive to divorce a woman here in California?

Because it's worth it.

What happens when the fog lifts in California?

UCLA.

Why is it that New Jersey got all the toxic waste dumps and California got all the lawyers?

New Jersey had first choice.

Where can you dance in California?

A. San Fran-disco

What do you call a watermelon in California?

A melon

What does Gwen Stefani say when it rains a lot in California?

No Drought.**

How do you know someone is from California?

They tell you.

What rhymes with California?

Every Red Hot Chili Peppers song writing session ever

What happens when the fog clears in California?

UCLA

How can you tell if a California State coed is a good cook?

She can get the pop tart out of the toaster in one piece.

California Jokes