How do you picture yourself flying on a broom?

By witchful thinking.

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What's the difference between an ant and a bird?

A bird can fly.

What has wings but can't fly, legs but can't walk, and a mouth but can't speak?

A dead bird

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Who is this Rorschach guy?

And why does he paint so many pictures of my parents fighting?

What do you call it when an oyster takes a picture of itself?

A shell-fie

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What happens next?

The broom gets sweepy.

What do you call promoting a broom to the highest rank in the military?

A Sweeping Generalization.