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How many trains have I derailed in all my years as a train driver?

It's hard to keep track.

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Year Jokes More Year Jokes

Why was it easier for the whistleblower to leave American soil earlier in the year?

It didn't Snowden.

What do you call a party of communists that haven't seen each other in years?

Soviet Reunion Terrible and painful, I know.

Train Jokes More Train Jokes

What do good dragons read when they are pregnant?

How to Train Your Dragon. Good parenting, that is.

How do you get an elephant on a train?

You take the "S" out of sub, and the "F" out of way. Say it out loud

Track Jokes More Track Jokes

Why is it so hard to keep track of counting in Afghanistan?

Because of the Taliban (say it out loud)

What does a musician train do when running from the law?

Covers tracks

Derail Jokes More Derail Jokes

Why did the train sound effect album get derailed?

The tracks were unfinished.

How many trains have I derailed in all my years as a train driver?

It's hard to keep track.

Train Driver Jokes More Train Driver Jokes

What do you give a train driver for Christmas?

Platform shoes!

What's the difference between a schoolteacher and a train driver?

A schoolteacher says "Spit out that toffee" and a train says "Choo choo."