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What came in the mail today?

Anthrax.

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What did the guy with a neckbeard say when he had to mail something twice?

REPOST!

Why can't you e-mail a photo to a Jedi?

Because attachments are forbidden.

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What did the angry dough ball say to the other dough ball?

You trying to get a rise out of me! Came up with while I was making pizza.

What came before the Big Bang?

The Big Foreplay.

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Why is everyone smiling at me today?

Checks fly* *no pants* Aaaah.

What's the difference between organized crime and the government?

Only one of them is organized. Couldn't help but post this. Went to see a former mafia boss today, and that joke was told leading up to him speaking.