What did General Patton do on Thanksgiving?

He gave tanks.

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Thanksgiving Jokes More Thanksgiving Jokes

What's the best way to kick a habit today (day after Thanksgiving)?

Cold turkey.

Why can't Vin Diesel differentiate Thanksgiving Turkey from his best friend?

Because they're both roasted

Tank Jokes More Tank Jokes

What did the fish scream when its tank cracked?

Dam-it!

Why did Mike Dukakis lose the 1998 Presidential election?

He TANKED his campaign!