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What did the light bulb say to the switch?

You turn me on.

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How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowplow?

Give her a shovel.

What's the deal with lampshades?

If your gonna turn on a light... Why shade it.

Light Bulb Jokes More Light Bulb Jokes

How many people with OCD does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. It *has* to be seven.

How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. They hold it in place and wait for the world to revolve around them.

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Who wins?

Neither. France surrenders and Italy switches sides.

Why did Eric Clapton switch from PC to Mac?

He had a bad experience with windows.