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What did they sew you up with?

My Dad laughing so hard - as he said "That's not funny!" Cat Gut

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Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

What would Joan Rivers be doing if she was alive right now?

Scratching at the inside of her coffin. Courtesy of my dad.

Who would win in a fight...your mom or your dad?

From the looks of it, your dad won

Laugh Jokes More Laugh Jokes

Why are you not laughing?

Cos I'm quitting today.

What do you do when you see a half dead native man crawling across your lawn?

Stop laughing and reload

Sew Jokes More Sew Jokes

What did the tailor say about her job?

It's sew sew

What did Captain Picard say when he saw the new sewing machine?

Make it sew!