Sew Jokes

Why can't redditors sew?

Because the thread has been locked by a moderator

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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How many cats does it take to make a fur coat?

None! Cats can't sew!

What did Picard say to Riker when the knitting machine wouldn't print single digits?

Make it sew number 1!

How's your homophone needlepoint project coming along?

Sew sew

Why would a needle even be in a haystack?

Who sews in a barn

What did Jean-Luc Picard say in frustration to the incompetent Singer repairman?

Make it *sew*!

What did they sew you up with?

Cat gut.

What did the tailor say about her job?

It's sew sew.

Who sews really really fast?

Tailor Swift

What is the difference between a dressmaker and a farmer?

A dressmaker sews what she gathers a farmer gathers what he sows.

What did Captain Picard say when he saw the new sewing machine?

Make it sew!

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Why can't you find good quality clothing on the Iron Islands?

They do not sew

What do you call someone who sews extremely fast?

Taylor Swift...

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Lock Jokes More Lock Jokes

How do you prove that your dog loves you more than your wife?

Lock them both in the trunk of the car for an hour, then open it up and see which one of them is happier to see you.

What did the knob say to the door?

I LOCK you a lot! yep, its corny, indeed, but... I'm tryin'! Skip

Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

When a dad drives past a graveyard: Did you know that's a popular cemetery?

Yep, people are just dying to get in there

Why is Simba an orphan?

Because his dad couldn't Mufasa 'nuff

Fur Coat Jokes More Fur Coat Jokes

How many cats does it take to make a fur coat?

None! Cats can't sew!

Why do bears have fur coats?

Because they'd look stupid in anoraks!

Riker Jokes More Riker Jokes

What did Picard say when Riker asked him what kind of Chinese food he wanted?

Make it Tso's Number One.

What's the difference between Rutgers and Rikers?

One turns young people into horrible human beings and the other is jail.

Gather Jokes More Gather Jokes

What is a gathering of octopus called?

Octoposse

What is the difference between a dressmaker and a farmer?

A dressmaker sews what she gathers a farmer gathers what he sows.

Farmer Jokes More Farmer Jokes

Why can't Micheal Bay be a farmer?

Because he dosen't have a plot.

Why did the farmer call his horse Baseball?

Because it's covered with horsehide!

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What came after the stone age and the bronze age?

Pupil: The sausage!

What did the farmer say when he tried to milk the cow, but nothing came out?

Time to try the udder one.

Taylor Swift Jokes More Taylor Swift Jokes

What do you call a fast clothes maker?

Taylor Swift! Made up by my nine year old

What do you call someone who sews extremely fast?

Taylor Swift...