Rate Jokes

What do you rate Megan Fox out of 10?

Friend: 9 Me: 9? I'll give her one..

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

$19.99

Why can't children watch pirate movies?

Because they're rated

Why is Texas the "Lone Star" state?

It was rated out of five.

Why couldn't a kid watch a pirate movie?

Because it was rated R.

How would you rate an average upholstery job upon completion?

Eh. Sew-sew.

What mathematical operation is used to calculate the rate at which lumberjacks cut wood?

Logger-rhythms.

What rating do pirate movies always get?

PG-13

What do you call an angry, seafaring mathematician?

Rate!!!

Why couldn't the 5 year old go to the pirate movie?

It was rated PG-13.

What kind of movies do pirates watch?

ARRRR Rated Movies!

Why couldn't Batman go to the movie?

Because it was rated "PG"

Couple's Daily Question Mug

$19.99

Why didn't the pirate get into the movie?

It was rated rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

Why did the movie critic give the movie he received on a burned disc a 3.14/5?

Because it was pi-rated.

Why couldn't the kid get in to see the pirate movie?

It was rated PG-13, and he was only 11. Plus, he had no money, and his mother didn't want him watching movies like that.

What's the pirate movie rated?

PG-13!

What kind of movie do mathematicians most often watch?

Rated movies

Who can watch an R rated movie but not a PG?

Batman

What is the horror movie Quija rated?

Quija-13

What rating did Moody's give to the sheep?

BAAA

Why is the new Zork game rated M for mature?

I guess it's too grue-some.

How would you rate USA and Saudi Arabia's relationship?

9/11

Everyday Deserves a Joke

$19.99

What's my rating from 1 to 10 for Harry Potter?

Nine and three quarters.

Why couldn't the kid see the pirate movie?

Because it was rated arrr!

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Watch Jokes More Watch Jokes

Why did KGB officers always travel in threes?

One who could read, one who could write, and the third to watch over those two dangerous intellectuals.

What do you call feeling bad about watching lame reality TV shows?

Survivor guilt.

Seven Jokes More Seven Jokes

Why was six scared of seven?

Because seven "ate" nine.

What's infinity minus one?

A sideways seven.

R Jokes More R Jokes

What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet?

Everyone thinks it's 'R', but his first love be the 'C'.

Why couldn't the kid get into the pirate movie?

It was rated R.

Rate Movie Jokes More Rate Movie Jokes

What kind of movie do mathematicians most often watch?

Rated movies

Crime Rate Jokes More Crime Rate Jokes

Why are crime rates down in the US?

Because criminals keep turning themselves into police.

What's the only thing that grows in Ferguson?

The crime rate.

69 Jokes More 69 Jokes

Why can't a blonde count to 70?

Because 69 is a bit of a mouthful.

What's the difference between Anders Breivik and a pro golfer?

Both were happy to shoot 69, but only Breivik went to jail.

10 Jokes More 10 Jokes

Why is the next Windows version 10 and not 9?

Because 7 ate(8) 9!

Why are you packing condoms for a sailing trip with 10 guys?

I'm saying "Just in case." Now I'm traveling with a bigger case.

Mother Jokes More Mother Jokes

What does a mother use to keep her childrens' toenails soft and smooth?

A pedi-file

What is with 2016?

It's like everyone and their mothers are dying. sorry not sorry