Why did the movie critic give the movie he received on a burned disc a 3.14/5?

Because it was pi-rated.

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What did Mr. Burns bring to the pot luck?

Eggsalad

What's it called when a dog burns down a building?

Arfson

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Why doesn't ISIS appear in any Sci-Fi shows or movies?

Because they are set in the future.

What made you leave it?

Well, the movie ended so

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Why can't children watch pirate movies?

Because they're rated

What do you rate Megan Fox out of 10?

Friend: 9 Me: 9? I'll give her one..

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What's worse?

Receiving a text from your girlfriend saying that you're breaking up or receiving a second text after saying that it was supposed to be for someone else

What did the astronaut get on his science project?

He received a T minus.