What do you call a man who has lost 95% of his brainpower?

A widower.

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What did the baker say after he found the dough he had lost?

That's just what I kneaded!

What did the snail say when his friend lost his car?

Where did Es-car-go.

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Why is it illegal for a man living in North Carolina to be buried in South Carolina?

Because he's alive.

When do men insist that women are illogical?

When a woman doesn't agree with them.

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What do you call a man who has lost 95% of his brainpower?

A widower.

How does Microsoft count to 10?

1, 2, 3, 95, 98, ME, NT, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10.