What do you call an accountant without a spreadsheet?

Lost

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Why did the Scarecrow lose the debate?

All he had was a straw-man argument.

Why shouldn't you carry two half dollars in your pocket?

Because two halves make a whole (hole) and you could lose your money.

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What do you call an accountant who is seen talking to someone?

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What do you call an accountant without a spreadsheet?

Lost

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Why do you love me?

Wife: *shrugs* Me: Why do you find me annoying Wife: *reveals six spreadsheets and a pie chart*

Why did the spreadsheets get divorced?

They just couldn't sort things out.