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What do you tell your wife with two black eyes?

Nothing, you already told her twice.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What do my wife and a chest freezer have in common?

The exterior is hot, but its cold as ice inside.

What did the peanut say to his wife before he left?

I'll be back in a jiffy

Black Eye Jokes More Black Eye Jokes

Where'd you get that black eye?

Me: My girlfriend gave it to me. Him: I thought your girlfriend was out of town. Me: I did too...

What do you say to a girl with a black eye?

Nothing. You already told her.