What is hard, long, and full of seamen?

A submarine

This joke may have profanity.

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What's long, stiff and full of se(a)men?

Maddie McCan

Why did the seamen cross the road?

Because I wore the wrong pair of socks this morning.

Submarine Jokes More Submarine Jokes

What's long, hard, and full of seamen?

A submarine.

Why did the Naval Inspector fail the submarine?

Because he found it to be SUB-standard.