What is long, white, and very sticky?

The coming of the Lord!

This joke may have profanity.

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How do you make cultured milk?

You take it to the Moo-seum.

Why did the A go to the bathroom and come out as an E?

Because he had a vowel movement.

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What's white and streaks across the sky at a thousand miles an hour?

The coming of the Lord.

Who should have played Bilbo Baggins in Lord of the Rings?

Bruce Willis. Because old hobbits die hard.