What is the American national day for vampires?

Fangsgiving Day.

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What kind of game are Americans worst at?

Tower defense.

What is the difference between British and American schoolchildren?

British schoolchildren survive hide-and-seek.

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Why did the elephant cross the road?

Because the chicken was having a day off!

What's longer than most relationships these days?

This status.

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Where did vampires go to first in America?

New-fang-land.

What kind of eye disease do vampires get?

Dracular degeneration.