What is the best way to follow a lost dog's paw prints?

With a track-tor!

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Where do animals go when they lose their tails?

The retail store!

What's the best way for an American to lose weight?

Gamble in British currency.

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What country always follows Zimbabwe?

Zimbab-Bee!

What's the difference between a blue 7 and a red 4?

3, duh. (My ex's 9 year old little sister told me this joke, and followed is up with: "and YOU'RE the math guy!" >< Burned.)

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What's the best way to catch a unique rabbit?

Unique up on him

What's the best way to get home from school?

Don't go to school.