What kind of work does a weak cat do?

Light mouse work.

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What's the difference between a camera and a foot?

A camera has photos and a foot has five toes. (Told to me by a 9 year old child I work with)

What do you think you're doing driving through that intersection fifty miles an hour?

Driver: My brakes don't work so I was rushing home before I had an accident.

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What kind of bug do you find on a long car ride?

An I-shoulda-pede.

What kind of gum do bees chew?

BUMBLEGUM. Five year olds think it's hilarious. I do not.