What's Alex's (from 'A Clockwork Orange') preferred type of light?

Ultraviolent

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What do you get when you cross a pig with a canary?

I don't know but when it sits on your electric wire and sings all your lights go out

How many indie kids does it take to change a lightbulb?

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Why don't English teachers like parole?

They prefer complete sentences.

How do you think the whole Deflategate situation feels to Tom Brady now?

Probably doesn't feel how he prefers it to...

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Who's there! Alex! Alex who?

Alex Plain later!

What is buoyancy?

Alex: I'm sorry. The answer we were looking for is, Whatever.

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What is your preferred type of birth control?

Well, its not preferred, but I practice abstinence.

What's Alex's (from 'A Clockwork Orange') preferred type of light?

Ultraviolent