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What's long and hard?

The sock under my bed.

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

What kind of fish would you want to go to bed with?

A cuddlefish! (corny I know)

What did the blanket say to the bed?

Don't worry, I've got you covered.

Sock Jokes More Sock Jokes

Why do all the best golfers keeping buying socks?

They get a hole in one!

Why did the elephant take off his socks at the golf course?

He got a hole in one.