What's the difference between a condom and the space-time continuum?

There wasn't a hole in my dad's space-time continuum.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between someone who can mend your pants quick and a famous singer?

One of them is a swift tailor.

What's the difference between a four year old and a bag of cocaine?

Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out a window.

Hole Jokes More Hole Jokes

Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?

In case they get a hole in one!

How many amateur masochists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one; But it takes a WHOLE E.R. room to extract it afterwards. Double joke! "whole... hole." it's a play on words

Condom Jokes More Condom Jokes

What do you call that part of the pharmacy where they keep the condoms, birth-control pills, etc.?

The Contrasection.

Why did the guitarist keep his condoms in his guitar case?

He only needed them after he'd opened it.