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What would they put on his coffin?

A lid!

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Coffin Jokes More Coffin Jokes

Why did the vampire go to the doctors?

Because he was coffin...

What's the difference between a condom and a coffin?

Well, both carry stiffs, but one's for coming and the other's for going.

Lid Jokes More Lid Jokes

Why did the ants dance on the jam jar?

The lid said, "Twist to open."

Why is ok to leave the lid off a basket of socialist crabs?

Because whenever one of them climbs to the top, the others drag it back down.