Who knows about math and science and is always close by?

An engi-near!

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What secret organization does Pinnochio work for?

Wooden you like to know

How do you know statisticians are always serious?

They mean what they say.

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How does my football throw look to you?

Me: Like you're good at science...

What is the cuddliest particle known to science?

The HUGS boson!

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How do bovines do math?

They use a cow-culator! Ba-dum-tsss!

What insect is good at math?

An account-ant.