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Why did Peter Parker get fired?

He spent all day on the web.

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Day Jokes More Day Jokes

Which is the month in which women talk the least?

February... because it has the least number of days

Whenever I'm in trouble, I think: what would Jesus do?

Then I pretend to be dead and disappear for three days.

Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

How's the wife?

Me:Glowing Neighbour:Pregnant Me:No, she's on fire, just going for more wood Neighbour:You're sick Me:You're next

What did the rubber band factory worker say when he was fired?

Oh snap!

Spend Jokes More Spend Jokes

Why do stoners spend so much money?

Because they're high rollers

How Dave Grohl spent his night in his hotel room after the concert in Gothenburg, Sweden?

He watched movie Cast Away (starring Tom Hanks) and ate some potato chips.

Peter Parker Jokes More Peter Parker Jokes

Why does Peter Parker main spy in tf2?

Because SPY DA MAN!

What does Peter Parker wish he would have went to school for?

Web design.

Web Jokes More Web Jokes

How do you spot a modern spider?

He doesn't have a web he had a website!

Why are spiders good swimmers?

They have webbed feet!