Why do golf commentators speak softly?

To not wake the audience.

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Speak Jokes More Speak Jokes

Why are do many Italian-Americans named Tony?

When they came to Ellis Island, not one of them could speak a lick of English, but they all had "To NY" on their hats.

What did the horse say to the other horse?

Hay,I thought you knew horses couldn't speak!

Wake Jokes More Wake Jokes

Why did the emo swallow an alarm clock?

So he could wake up inside.

How do you know a girl is into you?

Just pinch yourself, if you don't wake up, she doesn't.

Audience Jokes More Audience Jokes

Why did the alcoholic quit his acting career when the audience jeered at him?

He couldn't handle his boos.

How did I know my joke was not alright with my audience?

They all left.