Why does the philosopher have an automatic car..?

Because he Kant drive Immanuel.

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Why is Def leppard the best band to listen to while driving?

Because you only need one arm to drum along..

What do you call an Arab man who drives a bus?

A bus driver.

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How many philosophers does it take to......change a light bulb?

Define "light bulb".

How do you get a philosopher off your porch?

Pay him for the pizza.

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Why does the philosopher have an automatic car..?

Because he Kant drive Immanuel.