Why is time wary of mathematicians?

They're always plotting against it.

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Time Jokes More Time Jokes

Why do people take such an instant dislike to Ted Cruz?

It saves so much time.

What do you call a symphony where everyone plays at the same time instead of taking turns?

An chestra.

Mathematician Jokes More Mathematician Jokes

What did the mathematician say after Thanksgiving dinner?

1)/8"

Why don't mathematicians ever get blackout drunk?

They know their limits.

Plot Jokes More Plot Jokes

What happens when you heavily water farmland?

The plot thickens.

What did the author say when he added a chapter about flour to a story about soup?

The plot thickens!