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Why would he put that on a resume?

Oh. My. God. You're hired.

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God Jokes More God Jokes

What do you call it when you talk to God?

Praying. Now what do you call it when God talks to you? Schizophrenia, it's called schizophrenia.

What do Spanish Muslims call their God?

Ollah!

Hire Jokes More Hire Jokes

Why did the company hire the glutton?

Because he was a ate professional!

Why did they hire the police department to design a new superconductor?

STOP RESISTING!!!

Resume Jokes More Resume Jokes

What's this bit here?

NURSE: ...his heart ME: Hm. NURSE: Your resume said you were a surgeon ME: My resume says a lot of things

Whats the most common work of fiction?

The average persons resume