What's this bit here?

NURSE: ...his heart ME: Hm. NURSE: Your resume said you were a surgeon ME: My resume says a lot of things

Previous Random Joke Next

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What's the last thing you want to hear while using a urinal?

Nice watch

What is one thing you always get on your birthday?

Older

Lot Jokes More Lot Jokes

What do your mom and Poland have in common?

A lot of countries have been inside her.

How do you write an essay that blows people away?

With lots of drafts

Heart Jokes More Heart Jokes

What is Hannibal Lecter's favorite Jane Austen quote?

There is no charm equal to tenderness of heart."**

Why did I carve a heart with me and my boyfriends initials into a tree?

To sharpen the knife

Nurse Jokes More Nurse Jokes

How many doctors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one but he has to have a nurse to tell him which end to screw in.

What do you call a nurse with flat knees?

The "head" nurse.

Surgeon Jokes More Surgeon Jokes

What's the last thing you want to hear from a surgeon dissecting someone?

Oops

Why are you so excited?

The surgeon asked the patient that was about to be anesthetized. "But doc this is my first operation." "Really It's mine too and I am not excited at all."

Resume Jokes More Resume Jokes

Whatya doin?

Me: I fixed the toilet so I'm adding Potty Fixer to my resume W: You mean Plumber M: DO I LOOK LIKE A HOUSE SCIENTIST

How do you describe getting cancer on your resume?

As a real growth opprotunity