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What's this bit here?

NURSE: ...his heart ME: Hm. NURSE: Your resume said you were a surgeon ME: My resume says a lot of things

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Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

How do you drive this thing?

Two soldiers are in a tank. One turns to the other and says "GLUGGLUGBLUGBWOOABB"

What's that thing called when your crush likes you back?

Oh yeah. Imagination.

Lot Jokes More Lot Jokes

Why did the guy get aroused by the highway?

Because there were lots of turn ons.

Why does the mushroom have a lot of friends?

He's a fungi

Heart Jokes More Heart Jokes

How do you know if you've fallen in love with an apple from France?

Your heart goes "pomme pomme... pomme pomme..."

Why do marble statues look so mean?

They have hearts of stone.

Nurse Jokes More Nurse Jokes

What do you call a nurse with dirty knees?

The Head Nurse.

Why did the nurse keep the bedpan in the refrigerator?

Because when she kept it in the freezer it took too much skin off.

Surgeon Jokes More Surgeon Jokes

What did the surgeon say when the doctor declined going out after work?

Suture self!

Why did the surgeon refuse to dress for work?

He didn't want no scrubs

Resume Jokes More Resume Jokes

What's this bit here?

NURSE: ...his heart ME: Hm. NURSE: Your resume said you were a surgeon ME: My resume says a lot of things

Why would he put that on a resume?

Oh. My. God. You're hired.