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Why was the monster standing on his head?

He was turning things over in his mind.

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Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

What's a machinists favorite song?

Turn Down for What!

What can you do if you don't like the Prelude in C Sharp Minor?

Turn Rachmanin off.

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What is the first thing a woman should do when she gets out of the Battered Women's Shelter?

The dishes, if she knows what's good for her.

What is one thing you always get on your birthday?

Older

Mind Jokes More Mind Jokes

What is the burning question on the mind of every dyslexic existentialist?

Is there a dog?

What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train the other trains the mind.

Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

When you are driving though the field in Texas, you see a lot of cattle. They are very special. Wanna know why?

They are out standing in the field

What's the definition of a tree?

Something that stands still for forty years then suddenly jumps out in front of a woman driver.

Head Jokes More Head Jokes

What did the head trauma patients do when the price of medicine went up?

They went on stroke.

Why can Owls turn there head 270 degrees?

Because they don't have wing mirrors.

Monster Jokes More Monster Jokes

What has 40 teeth and holds a monster at bay?

My zipper.

Why did the monster lie on his back?

To trip up low-flying aircraft.