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How can you shorten a bed?

Don't sleep long in it.

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

How do you know when there is a snowman in your bed?

You wake up wet!

How do you know when you are in bed with a witch?

She has a big "W" embroidered on her pyjamas!

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

What's a meth head's favourite thing about Halloween?

Only two more sleeps till Christmas!

How did the midget feel after sleeping all night in a coffin?

A little stiff.

Shorten Jokes More Shorten Jokes

Why did the artist go to the bakery?

For shortening!

What do you do when your wife is blocking view of the TV?

Go to the kitchen and shorten her chain.