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How does a lawyer sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other. Credit: Nicholas Sparks from his book 'See Me' which I am reading now.

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Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

What lies on its back, 100 feet in the air?

A dead centipede.

Why did Dracula lie in the wrong coffin?

He made a grave mistake.

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

Where does King Kong sleep?

Anywhere he wants to.

What do you get if 2 black men sleep in a sleeping bag?

A twix bar

' Jokes More ' Jokes

Why does the Brotherhood of Steel from Fallout hate '80s music?

Because of the synths.

What’s Forest Gump’s Facebook password?

1forest1

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

Why Is Reddit Called Reddit?

Because you already read it.

What are you going to do with your time, now that you're retired?

I'm going to finish my book." "I didn't know you were writing a book." "I'm not, I'm reading one."

Lawyer Jokes More Lawyer Jokes

Why are Lawyers buried forty feet deep when they die?

Because deep down they're really nice people.

What is it called when two lawyers are fighting?

Civil War

Book Jokes More Book Jokes

What do books wear on a rainy day?

Rain Quotes

What do books have that Mexicans don't?

Papers.