How do you get a ghost to lie perfectly flat?

You use a spirit level.

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What do they use frozen band-aids for?

Cold cuts.

What do engineers use for birth control?

Their personality.

Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

Why do programmers drink coffee so much?

So they aren't lying when they say they like Java.

What do you get when you mix a dyslexic, an insomniac, and an agnostic?

Someone who lies awake at night wondering if there's a dog

Ghost Jokes More Ghost Jokes

How do you get a ghost to lie perfectly flat?

You use a spirit level.

Why did the ghost stink?

Because it was covered in sheet

Spirit Level Jokes More Spirit Level Jokes

How do Ghosts lay foundations?

With a spirit level!

How do Religious Education teachers mark exams?

With spirit levels.