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How did the alien tie his shoes?

With an astroknot.

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Shoe Jokes More Shoe Jokes

What's the hardest thing about having a colostomy bag?

Finding shoes to go with it.

Why do blondes have TGIF on their shoes?

Toes go in first!

Alien Jokes More Alien Jokes

Why did the aliens choose to not invade and enslave the human race?

Because they're not garbage collectors.

What mustache can an alien not pull off?

A human chu

Tie Jokes More Tie Jokes

Who won the race between two balls of string?

They we're tied!

Whats the difference between a noose and a leash?

How high you tie it on a tree.