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How does the balance sheet of a bank look like as of today?

On the left side there's nothing right and on the right side there's nothing left...

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Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Who takes over when the Ultrasound man is on leave?

The Hip Replacement Guy.

Why are you picking up rocks?

M: I'm starting a rock band. Neighbor walks away. That is how you get people to leave you alone.

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

What's the difference between the jokes I read today, and the jokes I read last week?

The posters

What would Hellen Keller be doing if she were alive today?

Clawing at the lid of the coffin.

Right Jokes More Right Jokes

What happens when your friend from Prague topples over?

You right a Czech.

What does it mean when a pedestrian has the right of way?

When you see a pedestrian, youve got to get them, right away