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How does Voldemort seal his mail?

With his Parceltongue.

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Mail Jokes More Mail Jokes

How do long distance runners send e-mail?

On the sprin-ternet.

What do vampires put at the bottom of their e-mails?

Best viscious.

Seal Jokes More Seal Jokes

What's your pleasure?

The seal replies, "Anything but Canadian Club."

What do you get when you cross a seal and a polar bear?

A polar bear.

Voldemort Jokes More Voldemort Jokes

Why are all the ladies attracted to Voldemort?

Because of his hex appeal.

Why does Voldemort have flat face?

He ran into wrong wall at train station