How is a thief like a thermometer on a hot day?

They are both up to something.

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Thief Jokes More Thief Jokes

Why are thieves the best actors?

Because they always steal the show.

What is the difference between a thief and a church bell?

One steals from the people the other peals from the steeple.

Thermometer Jokes More Thermometer Jokes

How are you feeling?

The thermometer responded, "0K."

How can you tell the difference between a thermometer and a rectal thermometer?

The taste.

Hot Day Jokes More Hot Day Jokes

How is a thief like a thermometer on a hot day?

They are both up to something.

What do you call a hot day in Canada?

A Nova Scorcha!