Why didn't the man report his credit card stolen?

Because the thief was spending less than his wife.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did the French chef give his wife on Valentine's Day?

A hug and a little quiche.

What do you get when you play country music backwards?

You get your job back, you get your wife back and you get your tractor back.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What does a man with two left feet wear to the beach?

Flip-Flips.

How man hipsters does it take to change a lightbulb?

It's an obscure number, your probably never heard of it.

Thief Jokes More Thief Jokes

Why did the thieves get caught after robbing the Louvre?

Cause they didn't have the Monet to get Degas to make the van Gogh.

Why do thieves have such a hard time understanding sarcasm?

They take things literally

Spend Jokes More Spend Jokes

Why does it take a pirate so long to finish saying the alphabet?

Because they spend years at sea.

What's the difference between a PC gamer and a console player?

One spends 400 dollars on a console that will play games for years, the other pays 400 dollars for a graphics card that will be outdated in a week

Steal Jokes More Steal Jokes

Why did Robin Hood steal from the rich?

Because the poor didn't have any!

What is that white thing in my pork&ampbeans?

The Queen Bean. *Blatantly stolen from Ren &amp Stimpy

Credit Card Jokes More Credit Card Jokes

Why didn't the man report his credit card stolen?

Because the thief was spending less than his wife.

What do you call a country that doesn't use credit cards?

A Czech Republic

Report Jokes More Report Jokes

How many journalists does it take to change a light bulb?

We just report the facts we don't change them.

What do you call a hollow dachshund?

Holloween. (*Please don't report me)