How do people know spiders are more afraid of me than I am of them?

Like, did you ask him Because only one of us is screaming right now.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How did the blind skydiver know he was about to hit the ground?

He felt the slack in his dog's leash.

How do you know if someone has a Samsung phone without asking?

Don't worry, they've already told you the superior qualities it has over all the other smart phones by this time.

People Jokes More People Jokes

Why does Hillary keep bumping into people at the White House?

So she can be pardoned.

What kind of people have the most beautiful eyes?

Beekeepers. Because beauty is in the eye of the beeholder.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What personal question is not obvious yet nobody has ever needed to ask anyone?

Are you vegan?

What do you get when you mix Fascism and Communism?

I don't know, that's why I was asking you.

Scream Jokes More Scream Jokes

What would George Washington do if he were alive today?

Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

What is 20 inches long and makes women scream at night?

A stillborn

Spider Jokes More Spider Jokes

Why did you put a toad in your sister's bed?

Son: I couldn't find a spider.

What kind of insects to secret agents like?

As told by my 9 yr old) Spiders.