Spider Jokes

What do you call a spider that likes 80s music?

A Durantula.

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What do you call a web developer who enjoys finding bugs in the system?

A spider

Which web developer enjoys finding bugs?

A spider!

Why was the spider inside the Computer?

He was looking for a webpage!

What's Varys the Spider's favorite OS?

Unix

What do you call a spider that wants to overthrow the government?

An anarchid.

What's a spiders favorite way to learn?

A webinar.

Why can't you talk to spiders who get shut in pianos?

They'll B flat

What does Bob the spider do for a living?

He's a web developer.

What did the spider say when he broke his new web?

Darn it!

Where do spiders play their FA Cup final?

Webley stadium!

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What do you call a David Bowie tribute band made up of astro-arachnologists?

The Spiders from Mars

What kind of insects to secret agents like?

As told by my 9 yr old) Spiders.

What do they call spiders in the Middle East?

Iraqnids

What does a spider want to be when he grows up?

This is really good guys...brace yourselves..........) A web designer.

What do you call spiders in the Middle East?

Iraqnids. Yep. An original.

How do people know spiders are more afraid of me than I am of them?

Like, did you ask him Because only one of us is screaming right now.

What do you call a spider from Baghdad?

An Iraqnid.

What are spiders webs good for?

Spiders!

What do you call it when a spider gets a pimple?

Arachne

What kind of doctors are like spiders?

Spin doctors!

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Why are spiders like tops?

They are always spinning!

What does Spider-Man wear when it gets cold out?

A Peter Parka

What did the spider say to the bee?

Your honey or your life!

What do you call a spider with no legs?

A raisin

What do you get when you cross a pig and a spider?

Bacon and scrambled leggs.

Why did the spider buy a car?

So he could take it out for a spin!

What do you get when you cross a bunny with a spider?

A harenet.

What do you call two spiders who just got married?

Newlywebs.

What do you call a Spider-Man that is a valet?

A Peter Parker

What's the most common career choice among spiders?

Web development

Why did the spider cross the road?

To get to his website!

Why are spiders so unproductive?

Because they hang out on the web all day!

What does a spider do when he gets angry?

He goes up the wall!

What's worse than spiders on your piano?

Crabs on your organ

Why do spiders hate Area 51?

It's a no-fly zone.

Why did you put a toad in your sister's bed?

Son: I couldn't find a spider.

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What do you call a web developer who enjoys finding bugs in the system?

A spider

What is the digestive system?

The digestive system is a system which starts with one hole and ends with one hole

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Why did the walrus go to the container store?

To find a tight seal.

What do you call a projectile that is very good at finding friends?

A homie missile.

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What do you call a web developer who enjoys finding bugs in the system?

A spider

Which web developer enjoys finding bugs?

A spider!

Hit Jokes More Hit Jokes

Why is that frisbee getting bigger?

Then it hits me.

What do you call an arcade game that involves you hitting avocados that pop out of the top of it?

Guac-A-Mole.

Hire Jokes More Hire Jokes

How do you hire a horse?

Put a brick under each hoof!

What do you get when Steve Jobs hires and fires a lot of people in six months?

An Apple turnover.

Van Jokes More Van Jokes

What's the difference between a normal ambulance and a skydiving ambulance?

Well, a normal ambulance is usually a van with a stretcher in the back. A skydiving ambulance A bucket and a shovel.

How many disappointments can you fit into a van?

I don't know, I can't get them outside of the house.

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did the bird join he air force?

He wanted to be a parrot trooper!

What are you planning on doing on MLK day?

Her: I plan on sleeping all day Me: ...Why Her: I want to have dreams too

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What is a video game characters favorite method of brawling?

Hitboxing!

What is Macauley Culkins favorite salad dressing?

Neverland Ranch.