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Spider Jokes

What do you call a spider that likes 80s music?

A Durantula.

I Love Pizza & You

I Love Pizza & You

What do you call a web developer who enjoys finding bugs in the system?

A spider

Which web developer enjoys finding bugs?

A spider!

Why did the recruiter hire a Spider?

Q: Why did the recruiter hire a Spider? A: Because he wanted to hire a Strong "Web Developer".

What do you get when you cross a bear and a spider?

A six-legged, honey-lovin', web-spinnin'

Why was the spider inside the Computer?

He was looking for a webpage!

What's Varys the Spider's favorite OS?

Unix

What do you call a spider that wants to overthrow the government?

An anarchid.

What's a spiders favorite way to learn?

A webinar.

Why can't you talk to spiders who get shut in pianos?

They'll B flat

What animal is two animals at the same time?

The Cat: because is a cat and a spider :)... oh, wait.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

What does Bob the spider do for a living?

He's a web developer.

What has two legs and looks like a spider?

A spider. (They have two legs and an additional six legs also)

What did the spider say when he broke his new web?

Darn it!

Where do spiders play their FA Cup final?

Webley stadium!

What do you call a David Bowie tribute band made up of astro-arachnologists?

The Spiders from Mars

What's wrong with that?

You've seen spiders before. Boy: Yes but this one is three feet wide and using all the hot water!

How do spiders drive a van?

10 on top 10 below Where would you like to go Get in. Get in the Spider Van.

What kind of insects to secret agents like?

As told by my 9 yr old) Spiders.

What do they call spiders in the Middle East?

Iraqnids

What does a spider want to be when he grows up?

This is really good guys...brace yourselves..........) A web designer.

$Your Age Is Only Math$

Your Age Is Only Math

What do you call spiders in the Middle East?

Iraqnids. Yep. An original.

How do people know spiders are more afraid of me than I am of them?

Like, did you ask him Because only one of us is screaming right now.

What do you call a spider from Baghdad?

An Iraqnid.

What are spiders webs good for?

Spiders!

What do you call it when a spider gets a pimple?

Arachne

What kind of doctors are like spiders?

Spin doctors!

Why are spiders like tops?

They are always spinning!

What does Spider-Man wear when it gets cold out?

A Peter Parka

What did the spider say to the bee?

Your honey or your life!

What do you call a spider with no legs?

A raisin

Birthday State of Mind

Birthday State of Mind

What do you get when you cross a pig and a spider?

Bacon and scrambled leggs.

Why did the spider buy a car?

So he could take it out for a spin!

What do you get when you cross a bunny with a spider?

A harenet.

What do you call two spiders who just got married?

Newlywebs.

What do you call a Spider-Man that is a valet?

A Peter Parker

What's the most common career choice among spiders?

Web development

Why did the spider cross the road?

To get to his website!

Why are spiders so unproductive?

Because they hang out on the web all day!

What does a spider do when he gets angry?

He goes up the wall!

What's worse than spiders on your piano?

Crabs on your organ

How many spiders does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two.

Why do spiders hate Area 51?

It's a no-fly zone.

Why did you put a toad in your sister's bed?

Son: I couldn't find a spider.

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What do white girls and web developers have in common?

Nobody ever compliments our back end

Which web developer enjoys finding bugs?

A spider!

Fly Jokes More Fly Jokes

What keeps fish from flying of Niagara Falls?

They don't have a pilots license.

What do you call a seagull that flies by the bay?

A bagel

Reboot Jokes More Reboot Jokes

How many IT guys does it take to Fix a printer?

Three, one suggests to check if it is plug in, another recommends to reboot the printer, and finally one to check to see if the printer had paper and laugh about how easy the solution was.

What do Spider-Man and Windows 98 have in common?

They're always rebooting.

Hire Jokes More Hire Jokes

How does Donald Drumpf change a lightbulb?

He doesn't. He hires people with long fingers to do it for him.

What are the two things someone with a face tattoo never hears?

You're hired" "Not guilty"

Web Designer Jokes More Web Designer Jokes

What's every spider's dream job?

A web designer.

What did the web designer do when a hot girl walked up to him and squeezed his nuts?

He AJAXulated.

Window Jokes More Window Jokes

What did Mrs. Claus say to Santa as they were looking out their front window?

Looks like rein dear

Why Romeo could not meet Juliet at an Apple Store?

Poor Juliet! Did not know Apple stores don't have Windows!

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

What should you do when your ex-girlfriend stands in the spotlights?

Drive faster.

Why did the wave fail the driving test?

It kept crashing on the beach.

10 Jokes More 10 Jokes

How many reindeers does Santa Claus have?

Santa Claus has 10 reindeers according to the song.

Why are you packing condoms for a sailing trip with 10 guys?

I'm saying "Just in case." Now I'm traveling with a bigger case.