How cold is it outside?

It is so cold outside I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.

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Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What do hand grenades and wives have in common?

Remove the ring and your house is gone.

What did the guy without hands get for Christmas?

We don't know, he hasn't opened the present yet

Pocket Jokes More Pocket Jokes

Why does Mr Tayto carry a phone in his top pocket?

In case Johnny Onion Rings!

What's it called when you commission someone to make an animated image for your girlfriend but he pockets the money and disappears?

A gf gif gift grift

Politician Jokes More Politician Jokes

How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to change it and another one to change it back again.

How do you tell the difference between a chemistry professor and a politician?

Just ask them to read this word: unionized.