Hot Day Jokes

What do you call a party thrown by a Terrorist at a bar on a hot day in Hawaii?

A-lou-AK-bar.

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What do you call a hot day in Canada?

A Nova Scorcha!

What are the hottest days during summer?

Sun-days

How is a thief like a thermometer on a hot day?

They are both up to something.

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Hello Lady Jokes More Hello Lady Jokes

What does the blind say when he walks past the fish market?

Hello ladies.

What did the visually-challenged gentleman say as he walked past the tuna stand at the open air market on a hot summer's day?

Hello ladies. Warm enough for you

3 Hour Jokes More 3 Hour Jokes

Why did the eskimo spend 3 hours arguing with the return counter?

Because the warranty is void if the seal is broken.

What did the gangster's son tell his dad when he failed his examination?

Dad they questioned me for 3 hours but I told them nothing.

Bar Jokes More Bar Jokes

What did the frog say when he walked into the bar?

Bonjour.*

Why did the nun always go to the same bar?

Habit

Pig Jokes More Pig Jokes

What's the strongest muscle on a pig?

The hamstring.

What do you call a pig that does karate?

Pork Chop!

Thermometer Jokes More Thermometer Jokes

How are you feeling?

The thermometer responded, "0K."

What did the thermometer say to the other thermometer?

You make my temperature rise.

Terrorist Jokes More Terrorist Jokes

What is the difference between a violist and a terrorist?

Terrorists have sympathizers.

What did the terrorist say about his popular reddit post?

I didn't expect this to blow up like it did!*

Thief Jokes More Thief Jokes

What kind of shoes do thieves wear?

Sneakers.

What do you call it when thieves in a metal boat steal your fool's gold?

Iron Pirate

Canada Jokes More Canada Jokes

How did Canada get its name?

They picked random letters out of a hat. C.... eh? N... eh? D....eh?

How do you know when your BBQ is ready in Canada in April?

The snow on top of it has melted.