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What's the difference between Politicians and Thieves?

Thief: They steal your money then run Politician: They run and then steal your money

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between Jesus and Bono?

Jesus doesn't think he's Bono

What is the difference between a saxophone and a chainsaw?

It's all in the grip.

Thief Jokes More Thief Jokes

Why didn't the man report his credit card stolen?

Because the thief was spending less than his wife.

What did the thief say when he saw the man leave his coat behind?

Let's jack it.

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

Why do people keep a picture of their wife and kids in their wallet?

To remind them why there's no money in it

What's a Catholic's favorite way to send money?

PayPal

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

What's the difference between a drunk driver and a stoned driver?

The drunk driver runs the stop sign. The stoned driver waits for it to turn green.

Why did the baby have such a poor time in the marathon?

He was running a little behind

Steal Jokes More Steal Jokes

Why didn't you report your stolen credit card?

Man: The thief was spending less than my wife. Police: Then why are you reporting it now Man: I think now the thief's wife has started using it!

What do you call someone that steals shoes?

A sneaker.

Politician Jokes More Politician Jokes

What did the RAM stick say to the politician?

I'm PC2!

What's the difference between a bad mechanic and a politician?

With the mechanic, there's a shot something might get fixed...