How long have you been in pain?

Women: It started at 7:45am on Monday while I was at work Men: Sometime between yesterday and 1997

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Start Jokes More Start Jokes

How can you tell a vampire has a cold?

They start coffin.

Why couldn't Bing start a fire?

No matches founds

Yesterday Jokes More Yesterday Jokes

Why did you call off yesterday?

Me: You said I should do what's best for the company. Boss.... Me: I'll take that promotion now.

What's the best way to see yesterday's front page?

9GAG

Pain Jokes More Pain Jokes

What do you call a water fowl looking in a window?

Peking duck. (it came to mind over dinner... I thought I would share the pain with everyone)

Why was the road in so much pain?

Because it has a carpool tunnel.

Monday Jokes More Monday Jokes

What would be a terrible name for a new beer?

Q: What would be a terrible name for a new beer A: "Mondays"...because no one would EVER want to buy a case of the Mondays...

What's the best thing about Portugal?

You never have to carry your bags because of all the porter-geese. Thankyou, im here till Monday!