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What's the best thing about Portugal?

You never have to carry your bags because of all the porter-geese. Thankyou, im here till Monday!

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Bag Jokes More Bag Jokes

How many raisins do I have to add to this bag of M&Ms before it qualifies as trail mix?

One I say one.

What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a 4 year old?

Eric Clapton wouldn't drop a bag of cocaine out a window

Carry Jokes More Carry Jokes

How many Polish people does it take to be pallbearers at a funeral?

Seven. Six to carry the casket and one to drag the body

What did the giant wave say to the man?

Nothing he just waved. Sea what I did there? Sorry sometimes I get a bit carried away, it like a tsunami of puns. Water these puns! they're horrible, I'll stop now.

Good Thing Jokes More Good Thing Jokes

What's the best thing to do with a thimble?

Bang it with a drum-thtick!

What's the best thing about dating twenty nine year olds?

The get all you '90s references.

M Jokes More M Jokes

What does a guy who can predict the lottery numbers 99% of the time have in common with the letters C, D, G, H, J, K, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, and Z?

They're not infallible

How many mm3 of dirt is there in a hole 1m x 1m x 1m?

There is no dirt in the hole!

Monday Jokes More Monday Jokes

What's the difference between a public park and a public toilet?

I need to know before my court date on Monday.

What are your plans for Easter?

Husband: Same as Jesus.. Wife: What do you mean Husband:I will disappear on Friday and reappear on Monday!!

Portugal Jokes More Portugal Jokes

What's the best thing about Portugal?

You never have to carry your bags because of all the porter-geese. Thankyou, im here till Monday!

What do you call a group of people from Portugal?

Portugeese