What did the blonde say when she knocked over a priceless Ming vase?

A. "It's okay Daddy I'm not hurt."

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Knock Jokes More Knock Jokes

Why can't you tell Walter White a knock knock joke?

Because HE is the one who knocks.

Who is the only person able to knock out Ronda Rousey?

Bill Cosby

Hurt Jokes More Hurt Jokes

What is red and hurts when you bite it?

A Brick.

What's the difference between me and a dentist?

The dentist pulls it out when it hurts.

Daddy Jokes More Daddy Jokes

Who wants to go out to dinner and scream and cry and make daddy wish he wore more condoms?

Kids: WE DO! YAY!

Why was the Ancient Egyptian boy confused?

His daddy was a mummy

A. Jokes More A. Jokes

Why does Mrs. Piggy douche with honey?

A. Because Kermit the Frog likes sweet and sour pork.

How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

A. Hell you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.