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What did the scarecrow say when the farmer asked him in for dinner?

No thanks, I'm stuffed.

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Scarecrow Jokes More Scarecrow Jokes

Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?

Because he was outstanding in his field

How did the scarecrow win a noble prize?

He was *out standing* in his field.

Farmer Jokes More Farmer Jokes

Why did the farmer make a high-pitched gasp?

Because he was tired of the sigh-low.

What did the farmer say after he fed his cows pot?

The Steaks are high.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

Why do people ask "what the hell were you thinking"?

Obviously, I was thinking I was gonna get away with it and not have to explain it

What did one fish ask the other?

So how do you drive this thing

Stuff Jokes More Stuff Jokes

When faced with a challenging situation I calmly ask myself "what would The Hulk do?

Then I rip my clothes and smash stuff up!

What do you get if you stuff your computer's disk drive with herbs?

A thyme machine.

Dinner Jokes More Dinner Jokes

What came first: the chicken or the egg?

The egg because I ate egg for breakfast and chicken for dinner.

What veggies are the kids having with dinner?

Me: (Smacking the bottom of a ketchup bottle) Fresh Tomatoes...