What do all my friends and my dad have in common?

I didnt have either growing up

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Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

What does my jokes and cancer have in common?

Only my dad gets it.

Why does Mom wear makeup?

Me: To look pretty. 5: But she's already pretty. Me: Aww. 5: Dad, you should wear makeup.

Friend Jokes More Friend Jokes

Why can't there be some sort of mathematic formula for making friends?

A squadratic formula, if you will.

What do coffee beans say to scare their friends?

Brew.

Grow Jokes More Grow Jokes

Why wouldn't the sow let her piglets play with toads?

She didn't want them to grow into wart hogs.

Why are Peter pan Jokes always funny?

Because they never grow old